If I were a dancer

I would be as light as a feather
and let the wind carry
all my troubles and fears
until I feel nothing.

I would be as strong as the wave
when it hits the shore
with conviction and passion,
washing all doubts and guilt.

I would be as colorful as the butterfly
that tiptoes on flowers
and help them bloom
with so much beauty.

If I were a dancer,

I would go find my rhythm,
stretch my arms, point my toes
and sway, jump, and turn,
exuding grace and elegance.

I would hear nothing
but music, that soothing melody
that tells me to close my eyes,
clear my mind, and just dance.


-Katherine Lopez
29 January 2011

Palladio by Escala

I'm currently drawn to this instrumental music, Palladio by Escala. It's played by a string ensemble, and I must say the music evokes so much power as if it's pushing you to do something great.



I first heard it here, in Emily's performance in Got to Dance UK. She's my favorite finalist, but she didn't win as champion. Still, for me, she's a real winner.



And she's just 11! (or maybe she's now 12 because this was last year). Anyway, I love how fluid her movements are. I love how graceful she moves, and my favorite part is when she turns on stage. So beautiful.

If I were a dancer, I'd love to perform the kind of dance that Emily does. It's so expressive. Although I would probably tone down a bit on the gymnastic stunts incorporated in the dance and perform more jumps and turns on stage. Haha. Well, I'm not a dancer so I can't say much about technique. I simply love to see strong yet graceful moves.

Here's Emily's performance in the Got to Dance UK Semifinals. Despite the flaws in her technique that Kimberly Wyatt, one of the judges, pointed out, I like this dance better than her performance in the finals because I think this has more emotions in it. Maybe it's because of her choice of music. Not that I'm saying that her performance in the finals was bad. As Kimberly Wyatt had said, it was a "powerhouse performance."



Now, there's Live to Dance in the U.S., which is their version of Got to Dance UK. I wonder if I will see another Emily in that show. :)

Officemate

May mga araw na
hindi tayo nagkikita
kahit ba tayo’y nasa
iisang palapag lamang
at ilang dipa ang layo
sa isa’t isa.

May mga gabing
hindi tayo nagkakasabay
sa paglisan sa gusaling
siyang pandayang
pinagbubuhusan ng talento
sa buong maghapon.

May mga sandaling
tayo ay nagkakalayo,
magkabilang dako,
at tanging tinig lamang
ng pangungulila
ang naglalapit sa atin.

Ngunit ako’y napapanatag
sa tuwing naiisip kong
nariyan ka lamang
sa tabi-tabi,
at makikita ulit kita bukas
sa ating opisina.

-Katherine Lopez
27 Enero 2011

Happiness

When you're happy, don't you just want to jump and dance and let your friends know how happy you are? When you receive good news, you can't wait to tell it to people close to you, can you? I remember when I was a high school freshman. When I saw my name in the list of Outstanding Students for the first quarter, I couldn't wait to tell my dad, so I ran, rushing to the school gate where he stood. Then, I tripped and fell on the cemented ground. Haha!

Which brings me to this yet another inspiring quote:


Don't you feel happier after you've shared your happy stories with others? When you know you have your family and friends to celebrate with for any achievement you've made? When you have a big smile painted on your face, and you have a dozen other smiling faces looking at you? Indeed, happiness is too big a gift to be enjoyed by only one person. It has to be unwrapped and let the people around you partake of the contents that spill out of the box. :)


P.S. The image above is a product of my playing around with Adobe Photoshop. It's not outstanding, I know, but I'm sharing it because minutes before I made this entry, I just learned how to change an image's background color and other basic stuff. Hehe. And that made me happy. :)

Counteracting

I may often dig a hole
and bury myself
deeper and deeper,
but you’ll always wait
at the ground
and call on me
to come out.

I may often close the door
on you, and tell you
to leave me alone,
but you’ll always wait
outside, softly knocking
at the steel gates
of my iron heart.

I may often fall silent
and just leave things
unsaid, unspoken,
but you’ll never get tired
of pushing me
to pour all my troubles
on you.

I may often come out
strong, not needing
a helping hand,
but your shoulders
will always offer rest
for my head, weary
with fears and anxieties.

I may often be riding
a rollercoaster of
emotions and moods,
but you’ll always be
my anchor, keeping me
steady, stopping me
from sailing away.

-Katherine Lopez
23 January 2011

A Cry

All alone, there I was
Thinking of my past
My world was just simple
My feelings were just plain
I just can't help it, I realized them all
I closed my eyes, and tears started to fall.

I always wonder why am I like this
Why, despite silence, I have no peace
I seem to look, to find something
And everywhere, I seem to have been searching
Truth, freedom, I want them all
But, can anybody hear my call?

Time is passing, and I'm still here
Feeling the emptiness, feeling the fear
What would become of me if I go on like this?
Would I be mournful, would I be foolish?
Would I be receiving a splendid grace?
Or would I just stare at an empty space?

But one day, I think, I've found the light
My heart was enlightened at the glorious sight
Hope flickered, I tried to carry on
My soul rose to sing a song
For now, I've felt a joy so true
And it is the joy of falling in love with you.


-Katherine Lopez
17 August 2002

===000===

So as I was cleaning and de-cluttering yesterday, I dug up the poem above, written on a stationery, from my "junk". When I read it again yesterday, I couldn't believe I wrote those words. They're so... cheesy. And emo. Haha! Well, I was 14 then. But regardless of the words I chose, I realized that what I was saying in that poem came true after eight years. Interesting, huh? :)

Bad vibes and cleaning and stationery

I wasn't feeling sunshiney today (translate: I was in a bad mood). I wasn't irritated at anyone or anything in particular. Maybe I was just tired plus this time of the month only we girls have messed up my mood. So with nothing better to do, I decided to clean my room.

It was a continuation of my cleaning/de-cluttering project which I started two Saturdays ago. To be organized in my room is one of my New Year's resolution (the other one is waking up when the alarm rings, but apparently, this is SO hard to do). I filled a 56 L rectangular plastic box with my college and high school clutter while thinking, "Why the heck are these still with me?"

I tend to be a pack rat. I keep stuff for sentimental reasons and because I keep on thinking they might be of use to me one day. Obviously, they weren't of any use except to eat up precious shelf space in my small bedroom. So I got rid of them - school notebooks, readings (a big WHY THE HECK AM I STILL HOLDING ON TO THEM!), the planners I used before, school projects - and said hello to a cleaner, more organized bedroom. I wouldn't post a photo of my bedroom here because it's not photogenic hehehe.

As I was de-cluttering this afternoon, I found some cute stationery that I used to collect when I was a kid. I remember spending the money I got from ninongs and ninangs, winning parlor games, and performing a song or dance number during Christmas on stationery because they're the only ones I could afford. Then, I would write notes on them - notes I would exchange with my cousins or friends in school. Over time, I used up those stationery, but here are the ones that are still with me:


I got them from Gift Gate, and they cost P6.50 to P7.50 each. The papers inside those envelopes are square (except for the third one from left, which are round) and they bear the same design as the envelopes containing them. They're so cute! :D I remember having quite a lot of Sanrio stationery before. It's good to know I didn't use them all up and managed to keep a few.

Another cute find is this:


I think I bought this in SM Supplies when I was a high school freshman. Or maybe when I was in sixth grade. I couldn't remember the exact year. Anyway, this pad carries 50 sheets with 50 different designs. The sheets have already been greatly depleted primarily because of the letters I wrote for my classmates during recollections and retreats. A few still remain, and I don't mind using them all up for another letter I will write.

I still have this penchant for stationery. I still smile whenever I see pretty ones while resisting the urge to buy them. But there are some that are quite tempting to buy, like this:

I bought this at Swell Stuff for P60. Even if the sheets are nothing but colored papers, the feminine and romantic cover design caught me. Also, Paris is one of the places I want to see before I die, and the Eiffel Tower is like calling on me. Hehehe.

So there. Whenever I'm in a bad mood, I really have this urge to clean or de-clutter. Maybe it's because I don't have to think of anything while doing that (except for where to put what). I just have to use my hands and rugs - a damp one and two dry ones. And a broom and dust pan, of course. Cleaning kind of releases bottled up tension, with all that wiping and sweeping. But what eventually painted a smile on my face is this:

From my dearest. Thank you :)

Free your mind

Have you been (or are you being) embattled with so much negativity that all you want to do is sleep your troubles away, wishing that when you waked up, they're all gone? Here's something from Design is Mine that can probably help:


Translation: Let go. Easier said than done, huh? I am always told to let go of my emotional baggage, especially my ghosts from the past. Thankfully, I'm no longer "emo", unlike when I was still a student. I've learned to be more positive rather than keep on thinking about the things I have no control of.

But honestly, there's still one "ghost" I can't really free myself from. And it haunts me every now and then. I'm hoping (and working for it) that the day that ghost will no longer come back will come soon.

Another thing that can help: smile. Smile a lot. It makes you prettier, and when you see a pretty face in the mirror, won't you exude and attract good vibes as well? :)

Telling Signs

We may only have minutes
to talk about our day,
but your stories go on
and on, much like
a bottomless well.

We may only have hours
solely for each other,
but the look of longing
in your eyes makes up
for not being with me.

We may only have little
to spend, to shell out,
but the warmth
in each other’s arms
brings us so much joy.

We can only say so much
to speak our hearts out,
but let our touch, our gaze,
our kiss, our embrace say
what words cannot.

-Katherine Lopez
16 January 2011